Your alarm clock goes off, waking you abruptly out of a pleasant dream. Your mind quickly races to, "What day is this?" followed by, "Oh, that's right, Thursday! I have to finish the report that's due tomorrow, meet with the committee at 2 o'clock, return that client's phone call, and get a proposal out for so-and-so." I don't know about you, but my days sometime seem like an endless stream of "to do" lists!
We drag ourselves from bed and get ready for yet another day of this game we play called, "Crossing as many items off our 'to do' list as possible!" What if life didn't have to be like that? Do you really believe that we were created to see how much we could get accomplished? I think that perhaps we were put on this earth to see what we could become. Maybe instead of a "to do" list for every day, we should be making a "to be" list for ourselves.
Benjamin Franklin, for instance, placed great value on self-improvement. He believed that integrity and moral responsibility were the backbone of a successful life and a strong community. While in his late twenties, reading and reflection led him to formulate his own list of thirteen personal virtues, which he then attempted to master, one-by-one, noting his progress each day on a chart he carried in a small notebook.
Just for the fun of it, I will share with you Franklin's 13 virtues:
- Temperance: Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.
- Silence: Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.
- Order: Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.
- Resolution: Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.
- Frugality: Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.
- Industry: Lose no time; be always employed in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.
- Sincerity: Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly, and, if you speak, speak accordingly.
- Justice: Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty.
- Moderation: Avoid extremes; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.
- Cleanliness: Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, cloths, or habitation.
- Tranquility: Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.
- Chastity: Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another's peace or reputation.
- Humility: Imitate Jesus and Socrates.
While I don't necessarily suggest that we should adopt Franklin's personal "to be" list, I do think that he had the right idea in letting the quality you want to experience be more important than the list of goals you want to accomplish.
I'd like to offer a more practical "to be" list that you might want to consider as you reflect on your day. Like Ben Franklin, choose one quality that you would like to exemplify each day. I suggest you write it at the top of your "to do" list as a reminder of your overriding goal. Whether or not you accomplish all the items on your to do list, you will begin to experience a better quality of life. Here are some ideas to get you started.
Today I will:
- Count my blessings
- Take time to listen
- Choose optimism over pessimism
- Touch the lives of others in a positive way
- Take the time to be polite and courteous
- Choose my words wisely to build others up
- Experience the wonder of the world around me
- Be a source of encouragement for others
- Be honest in all I communicate to others
- Find joy and satisfaction in doing my best
- Be happy and content with what I already have in life
- Be forgiving of others and let go of past grudges
- See things from other people's perspective
- Keep my commitments
- Refuse to listen to or contribute to gossip
- Be generous with my time and money
- Delight in others and their unique strengths
- Savor every moment
It's not about what you want to do today that is most important, but rather, what you want to be, or feel, or experience. As you're thinking about your own list, ask yourself, "What qualities of life do I want to experience today?"