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angel
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« Reply #570 on: June 16, 2010, 11:52:42 AM » |
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Why is it that I now have the freedom to move where I want and all I want to do is hold you in my arms and let you tell me that things are going to be OK?" Because Mr. Reality (or Dr. Reality) has pulled out his syringe and giving her intervenous injections. TEXTBOOK HOOVERING don't you think?
Yes, IMO. Like on Johnny Carson between commercials, "more to come". |
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Desire nothing except desirelessness. Want nothing and you will have everything.
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Bystander
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« Reply #571 on: June 17, 2010, 12:02:49 AM » |
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YOUR next step should be to get started packing HER things now. With a cheerful enthusiasm!!  WHATEVER you do, DON'T FALL FOR THE SAD STUFF! This is what SHE wanted, right? |
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49andlost
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« Reply #572 on: June 21, 2010, 11:43:14 AM » |
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Packing is the theme for this week... We have about 12 days to be ready for the move(s), and for the most part I am packed. She did begin packing some stuff this weekend and I believe she will continue that today. The D's are packed and ready, but they will have some serious second thoughts as the day gets closer so I will be wary of those  emotions. I hope I am emotionally ready for this myself, I believe I am but wow do I sometimes freeze and look around as to what we are losing. Long road ahead for sure...  49andlost |
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My competitive nature wants me to win this battle, but only if that means I end up with a better partner, lover, friend...regardless of who that is. - Me
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pexio
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« Reply #573 on: June 21, 2010, 12:47:46 PM » |
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Long road ahead for sure... That's true. The road you've been on has been full of potholes and twists and turns and hard to navigate. Almost magically though, just up ahead, the road turns into asphalt, straight and smooth as far as the eye can see. You'll like that road.  |
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49andlost
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« Reply #574 on: June 29, 2010, 12:03:34 PM » |
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Extreme Hoovering weekend...
We are within days of new places for each of us and we had probably one of the best weekends together we have had in the last 10 years. Sex, conversation, laughs, intamacy....you name it and we participated.
But honestly it really ended up feeling like we were saying "good bye" to each other. I don't think that I am too disapointed about that either, I am looking forward to the major new life changes more than I thought. No regrets here...ready to move on.
49andlost
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My competitive nature wants me to win this battle, but only if that means I end up with a better partner, lover, friend...regardless of who that is. - Me
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jacksondad
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« Reply #575 on: June 29, 2010, 04:38:38 PM » |
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I've been right were your at now, soon enough you'll be seeing how reality starts pulling her from the fog and you'll have more day's just like that weekend. Here's the big question, do you want her back? I'm asking because shortly after my ex moved into her own place and our divorce was final, reality really moved her along and now we are working on rebuilding our relationship and your chance is coming sooner than you think. Dont press the issue, just watch the flower bloom and enjoy it from a distance. Best of luck
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"21 Wonderfull year's,now just a stolen memory!
The truth that makes men free is for the most part the truth which men prefer not to hear.
Herbert Agar
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49andlost
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« Reply #576 on: July 06, 2010, 11:51:43 AM » |
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Wow I was back into needing her so fast I made my own head spin...
Something has snapped me out of it in the last 24 hours....I am back to detaching and moving on. I am stunned at how easy it was to open my heart back up for "us" based on some good times, but nothing that would suggest permanent changes in her.
Shame on me, I will not slip up again...full speed ahead...I deserve better for myself. Fuck this...
49andlost
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My competitive nature wants me to win this battle, but only if that means I end up with a better partner, lover, friend...regardless of who that is. - Me
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49andlost
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« Reply #577 on: July 08, 2010, 10:11:46 AM » |
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I have successfully detached ...once again...and guess who is coming back around for attention???
I feel like a drug for her that she needs to be at her beckon call when she wants...and to make sure that I leave her alone when she wants her "space". Not ever again will I find myself feeling like yesterday's news, not to anyone.
It feels great to be back in control again...
49andlost
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My competitive nature wants me to win this battle, but only if that means I end up with a better partner, lover, friend...regardless of who that is. - Me
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49andlost
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« Reply #578 on: July 15, 2010, 07:34:43 PM » |
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Inches away from freedom now... Escrows are closing and by this time next week we should be in seperate residences. She is as volatile as I have ever seen. Even caught her looking through my cell phone to see what I have been doing. Man the tide has really turned...I think a tsunami is approaching.  49andlost |
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My competitive nature wants me to win this battle, but only if that means I end up with a better partner, lover, friend...regardless of who that is. - Me
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Faithful Father
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« Reply #579 on: July 15, 2010, 08:34:29 PM » |
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So when will you be 49andFound?
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Man of God, Faithful Husband (by covenant with God), and Father.
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Bystander
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« Reply #580 on: July 15, 2010, 08:57:49 PM » |
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Or "49andFinallyFree" ??  |
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49andlost
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« Reply #581 on: July 17, 2010, 12:03:57 PM » |
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Both great questions and suggested new names...  Looks like next week is it, and my new life begins. I am a little overwhelmed with all the changes coming up, but I will get through it. Asking for some advice from you that have been through it...what is the best way to occupy my time so that I don't have down time and sit and dwell on all the changes? Hobbies, dive into work, fix up the new place...what worked best for you? Thanks, 49andlost (I don't feel lost anymore for sure, but it is my original name here and it will remind me how far I have come, so I guess I will keep it ) |
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My competitive nature wants me to win this battle, but only if that means I end up with a better partner, lover, friend...regardless of who that is. - Me
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Roger Wilco
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« Reply #582 on: July 17, 2010, 02:20:10 PM » |
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Two things help me: working 6 hours a day, 7 days a week and woodworking.
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Faithful Father
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« Reply #583 on: July 17, 2010, 02:50:01 PM » |
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Not that I'm in your position (yet), but I'm installing shelving right now! (and made two book cases recently...)
I say--re-discover yourself by trying the new hobby that you always wanted to try. I started doing paintball--and I have a blast doing it! Picked up some light wood-working, which is fun. Bought some great stogies from Finck's...which I enjoy. I'm discovering new music and loving it... I try to hit the Links about once a week... And I see any new movie (of interest) that comes out... I bet finding things to occupy your time will be easy.
Make your idle time by choice, not by depression. (I've even started cleaning the house more, and find it oddly gratifying... Who would have thought I'd be a good house-husband?). (!)
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« Last Edit: July 17, 2010, 04:08:20 PM by Faithful Husband »
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Man of God, Faithful Husband (by covenant with God), and Father.
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Shell Shocked
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« Reply #584 on: July 17, 2010, 06:55:12 PM » |
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Looks like next week is it, and my new life begins. I am a little overwhelmed with all the changes coming up, but I will get through it.
I'm with you brother. I have about 17 hours left in my old home. We can, and will, overcome this most crazy of times. Doesn't it all feel so surreal? SS |
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"We are not human beings having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings having a human experience."
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